| I. |
|
| |
|
| I hesitated |
|
| before untying the bow |
|
| that bound this book together. |
|
| |
|
| A black book: |
|
| ALBUMS |
5 |
| CA. AGRIPPA |
|
| Order Extra
Leaves |
|
| By
Letter and Name |
|
| |
|
| A Kodak album of time-burned |
|
| black construction paper |
10 |
| |
|
| The string he tied |
|
| Has been unravelled by years |
|
| and the dry weather of trunks |
|
| Like a lady's shoestring from the First World
War |
|
| Its metal ferrules eaten by oxygen |
15 |
| Until they resemble cigarette-ash |
|
| |
|
| Inside the cover he inscribed something in
soft graphite |
|
| Now lost |
|
| Then his name |
|
| W.F. Gibson Jr. |
20 |
| and something, comma, |
|
| 1924 |
|
| |
|
| Then he glued his Kodak prints
down |
|
| And wrote under them |
|
| In chalk-like white pencil: |
25 |
| "Papa's saw mill, Aug. 1919." |
|
| |
|
| A flat-roofed shack |
|
| Against a mountain ridge |
|
| In the foreground are tumbled boards and offcuts
|
|
| He must have smelled the pitch, In August |
30 |
| The sweet hot reek |
|
| Of the electric saw |
|
| Biting into decades |
|
| |
|
| Next the spaniel Moko |
|
| "Moko 1919" |
35 |
| Poses on small bench or table |
|
| Before a backyard tree |
|
| His coat is lustrous |
|
| The grass needs cutting |
|
| Beyond the tree, |
40 |
| In eerie Kodak clarity, |
|
| Are the summer backstairs of Wheeling, |
|
| West Virginia
|
|
| Someone's left a wooden stepladder out |
|
| |
|
| "Aunt Fran and [obscured]" |
45 |
| Although he isn't, this gent |
|
| He has a "G" belt-buckle |
|
| A lapel-device of Masonic origin |
|
| A patent propelling-pencil |
|
| A fountain-pen |
50 |
| And the flowers they pose behind so solidly
|
|
| Are rooted in an upright length of whitewashed
|
|
| concrete sewer-pipe.
|
|
| |
|
| Daddy had a horse named Dixie |
|
| "Ford on Dixie 1917" |
55 |
| A saddle-blanket marked with a single star
|
|
| Corduroy jodpurs |
|
| A western saddle |
|
| And a cloth cap |
|
| Proud and happy |
60 |
| As any boy could be |
|
| |
|
| "Arthur and Ford fishing 1919" |
|
| Shot by an adult |
|
| (Witness the steady hand |
|
| that captures the wildflowers |
65 |
| the shadows on their broad straw hats |
|
| reflections of a split-rail fence) |
|
| standing opposite them, |
|
| on the far side of the pond, |
|
| amid the snake-doctors and the mud, |
70 |
| Kodak in hand, |
|
| Ford Sr.? |
|
| |
|
| And "Moma July, 1919" |
|
| strolls beside the pond, |
|
| in white big city shoes, |
75 |
| Purse tucked behind her, |
|
| While either Ford or Arthur, still straw-hatted,
|
|
| approaches a canvas-topped touring car. |
|
| |
|
| "Moma and Mrs. Graham at fish hatchery 1919"
|
|
| Moma and Mrs. G. sit atop a graceful concrete |
80 |
| arch. |
|
| |
|
| "Arthur on Dixie", likewise 1919, |
|
| rather ill at ease.
|
|
| On the roof behind the barn, behind him, |
|
| can be made out this cryptic mark: |
85 |
| H.V.J.M.[?] |
|
| |
|
| "Papa's Mill 1919", my grandfather most regal
amid a wrack of |
|
| cut lumber, |
|
| might as easily be the record |
|
| of some later demolition, and |
90 |
| His cotton sleeves are rolled |
|
| to but not past the elbow, |
|
| striped, with a white neckband |
|
| for the attachment of a collar. |
|
| Behind him stands a cone of sawdust some thirty
feet in height. |
95 |
| (How that feels to tumble down, |
|
| or smells when it is wet) |
|
|
|
| II. |
|
| |
|
| The mechanism: stamped black tin, |
|
| Leatherette over cardboard, bits of boxwood,
|
|
| A lens |
100 |
| The shutter falls |
|
| Forever |
|
| Dividing that from this. |
|
| |
|
| Now in high-ceiling bedrooms, |
|
| unoccupied, unvisited, |
105 |
| in the bottom drawers of veneered bureaus
|
|
| in cool chemical darkness curl commemorative
|
|
| montages of the country's World War dead,
|
|
| |
|
| just as I myself discovered |
|
| one other summer in an attic trunk, |
110 |
| and beneath that every boy's best treasure
|
|
| of tarnished actual ammunition |
|
| real little bits of war |
|
| but also |
|
| the mechanism |
115 |
| itself. |
|
| |
|
| The blued finish of firearms
|
|
| is a process, controlled, derived from common
|
|
| rust, but there |
|
| under so rare and uncommon a patina |
120 |
| that many years untouched |
|
| until I took it up |
|
| and turning, entranced, down the unpainted
|
|
| stair, |
|
| to the hallway where I swear |
125 |
| I never heard the first shot. |
|
| |
|
| The copper-jacketed slug recovered |
|
| from the bathroom's cardboard cylinder of
|
|
| Morton's Salt |
|
| was undeformed |
130 |
| save for the faint bright marks of lands |
|
| and grooves |
|
| so hot, stilled energy, |
|
| it blistered my hand. |
|
| |
|
| The gun lay on the dusty carpet. |
135 |
| Returning in utter awe I took it so carefully
up |
|
| That the second shot, equally unintended,
|
|
| notched the hardwood
bannister and brought |
|
| a strange bright smell
of ancient sap to life |
|
| in a beam of dusty
sunlight. |
140 |
| Absolutely alone |
|
| in awareness of the
mechanism. |
|
| |
|
| Like the first time you put your mouth |
|
| on a woman. |
|
|
|
| III.
|
|
| |
|
| "Ice Gorge at Wheeling |
145 |
|
1917" |
|
| |
|
| Iron bridge in the distance, |
|
| Beyond it a city. |
|
| Hotels where pimps went about their business
|
|
| on the sidewalks of a lost world. |
150 |
| But the foreground is in focus, |
|
| this corner of carpenter's Gothic, |
|
| these backyards running down to the freeze.
|
|
| |
|
| "Steamboat on Ohio River", |
|
| its smoke foul and dark, |
155 |
| its year unknown, |
|
| beyond it the far bank |
|
| overgrown with factories. |
|
| |
|
| "Our Wytheville |
|
| House Sept. 1921" |
160 |
| |
|
| They have moved down from Wheeling and my
father wears his |
|
| city clothes. Main Street is unpaved and an
electric streetlamp is |
|
| slung high in the frame, centered above the
tracked dust on a |
|
| slack wire, suggesting the way it might pitch
in a strong wind, |
|
| the shadows that might throw. |
165 |
| |
|
| The house is heavy, unattractive,
sheathed in stucco, not native |
|
| to the region. My grandfather, who sold supplies
to contractors, |
|
| was prone to modern materials, which he used
with |
|
| wholesaler's enthusiasm. In 1921 he replaced
the section of brick |
|
| sidewalk in front of his house with the broad
smooth slab of poured |
170 |
| concrete, signing this improvement with a
flourish, "W.F. |
|
| Gibson 1921". He believed in concrete and
plywood |
|
| particularly. Seventy years later his signature
remains, the slab |
|
| floating perfectly level and charmless between
mossy stretches of |
|
| sweet uneven brick that knew the iron shoes
of Yankee horses. |
175 |
| |
|
| "Mama Jan. 1922" has come out to sweep the
concrete with a |
|
| broom. Her boots are fastened with buttons
requiring a special instrument. |
|
| |
|
| Ice gorge again, the Ohio,
1917. The mechanism closes. A |
|
| torn clipping offers a 1957 DeSOTO FIREDOME,
4-door Sedan, |
|
| torqueflite radio, heater and power steering
and brakes, new |
180 |
| w.s.w. premium tires. One owner. $1,595. |
|
|
|
| IV. |
|
| |
|
| He made it to the age of
torqueflite radio |
|
| but not much past that, and never in that
town. |
|
| That was mine to know, Main Street lined |
|
| with Rocket Eighty-eights, |
185 |
| the dimestore floored with wooden planks |
|
| pies under plastic in the Soda Shop, |
|
| and the mystery untold, the other thing, |
|
| sensed in the creaking of a sign after midnight
|
|
| when nobody else was there. |
190 |
| |
|
| In the talc-fine dust beneath the platform
of the |
|
| Norfolk & Western
|
|
| lay indian-head pennies undisturbed |
|
| since the dawn of
man. |
|
| |
|
| In the banks and courthouse, a fossil time |
195 |
| prevailed, limestone centuries.
|
|
| |
|
| When I went up to Toronto |
|
| in the draft, |
|
| my Local Board was there on Main Street, |
|
| above a store that bought and sold pistols. |
200 |
| I'd once traded that man a derringer for a
|
|
| Walther P-38. |
|
| The pistols were in the window |
|
| behind an amber roller-blind |
|
| like sunglasses. |
205 |
| I was seventeen or so but
basically I guess |
|
| you just had to be a white boy. |
|
| I'd hike out to a shale pit and run |
|
| ten dollars worth of 9mm |
|
| through it, so worn you hardly |
210 |
| had to pull the trigger. |
|
| Bored, tried shooting |
|
| down into a distant stream but |
|
| one of them came back at me |
|
| off a round of river rock |
215 |
| clipping walnut twigs from a branch |
|
| two feet above my head. |
|
| So that I remembered the mechanism. |
|
|
|
| V.
|
|
| |
|
| In the all night bus station
|
|
| they sold scrambled eggs to state troopers |
220 |
| the long skinny clasp-knives called fruit
knives |
|
| which were pearl handled watermelon-slicers
|
|
| and hillbilly novelties in brown varnished
wood |
|
| which were made in Japan. |
|
| |
|
| First I'd be sent there at night only |
225 |
| if Mom's carton of Camels ran out |
|
| but gradually I came to value |
|
| the submarine light, the alien reek |
|
| of the long human haul, the strangers |
|
| straight down from Port Authority |
230 |
| headed for Nashville, Memphis, Miami. |
|
| Sometimes the Sheriff watched them get off
|
|
| making sure they got back on. |
|
| |
|
| When the colored restroom |
|
| was no longer required |
235 |
| they knocked open the cinderblock |
|
| and extended the magazine rack |
|
| to new dimensions, |
|
| a cool fluorescent cave of dreams |
|
| smelling faintly and forever of disinfectant, |
240 |
| perhaps as well of the travelled fears |
|
| of those dark uncounted others who, |
|
| moving as though contours of hot iron, |
|
| were made thus to dance |
|
| or not to dance |
245 |
| as the law saw fit. |
|
| |
|
| There it was that I was
marked out as a writer, |
|
| having discovered in that alcove |
|
| copies of certain magazines |
|
| esoteric and precious, and, yes, |
250 |
| I knew then, knew utterly, |
|
| the deal done in my heart forever, |
|
| though how I knew not, |
|
| nor ever have. |
|
| |
|
| Walking home |
255 |
| through all the streets unmoving |
|
| so quiet I could hear the timers of the traffic
lights a block away: |
|
| the mechanism. |
|
| Nobody else, just the silence |
|
| spreading out |
260 |
| to where the long trucks groaned |
|
| on the highway |
|
| their vast brute souls in want. |
|
|
|
| VI.
|
|
| |
|
| There must have been a true
last time |
|
| I saw the station but I don't remember |
265 |
| I remember the stiff black horsehide coat
|
|
| gift in Tucson of a kid named Natkin |
|
| I remember the cold |
|
| I remember the Army duffle |
|
| that was lost and the black man in Buffalo |
270 |
| trying to sell me a fine diamond ring, |
|
| and in the coffee shop in Washington |
|
| I'd eavesdropped on a man wearing a black
tie |
|
| embroidered with red roses |
|
| that I have looked for ever since. |
275 |
| |
|
| They must have asked me something |
|
| at the border |
|
| I was admitted |
|
| somehow |
|
| and behind me swung the stamped tin shutter |
280 |
| across the very sky |
|
| and I went free |
|
| to find myself |
|
| mazed in Victorian brick |
|
| amid sweet tea with milk |
285 |
| and smoke from a cigarette called a Black
Cat |
|
| and every unknown brand of chocolate |
|
| and girls with blunt-cut bangs |
|
| not even Americans |
|
| looking down from high narrow windows |
290 |
| on the melting snow |
|
| of the city undreamed |
|
| and on the revealed grace |
|
| of the mechanism, |
|
| no round trip. |
295 |
| |
|
| They tore down the bus station
|
|
| there's chainlink there |
|
| no buses stop at all |
|
| and I'm walking through Chiyoda-ku |
|
| in a typhoon |
300 |
| the fine rain horizontal |
|
| umbrella everted in the storm's Pacific breath
|
|
| tonight red lanterns are battered, |
|
| |
|
| laughing, |
|
| in the mechanism. |
305 |
| |
|
| . |
|